The British economist John Kay wrote, “I am irresistible, I say, as I put on my designer fragrance. I am a merchant banker, I say, as I climb out of my BMW. I am a juvenile lout, I say, as I down a glass of extra strong lager. I am handsome, I say, as I don my Levi’s jeans.”
What do people internalize when they interact with you? What image does your idea help them conjure up about themselves? Your audience aches to believe that you “represent” them and that you’re in it for, and with, them. Your ability to reach outside of yourself, and connect with them in a meaningful and reflective way, demonstrates this bond.
You’re them. They’re you. Connect your passion and purpose to their passion and purpose. Relate your unique view of the world and your place in it to their unique view of the world and their place in it. They long to see themselves and their unique needs in the reflection of your carefully polished idea. They crave your humble, yet confident and wide-eyed passion for the possible. They want you to display personality and to be vulnerable and human, like them.
Bill Cosby once said, “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” Being reflective is ignoring everybody and being one with your audience. It’s about regarding them the way they regard themselves--as insiders, collaborators, and protagonists of the idea.
It’s feeding their spirit, giving them a sense of belonging and adding to their feeling of identity by being special and standing out. Reflective helps people experience the most powerful feeling in the world, “It’s not just me who feels this way. I am not alone.”