Tom Asacker

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Truth Eight: From Honesty to Authenticity

People today are incredulous of marketing, institutions and the media. The only way to suspend disbelief, cut through skepticism and create trust is to act as a real human being and get to the truth. As the sages say: "Words that come from the heart can enter the heart."

Try this: Ask everyone you meet today if they believe themselves to be honest. They will undoubtedly answer, "Sure." Okay. So then what exactly has happened to the world of business - from Enron, Arthur Anderson and WorldCom, to Global Crossing, Adelphia, Xerox, and others? What happened to all of those "honest" people? They’re still honest. They’re just not authentic. In my view, business has become infected with the same sickness that has infected the world of politics - professionalism. You read it right. Paid professionalism rules politics and big business today, with emphasis squarely on the word “paid.” Money has become their single-minded pursuit and measure of success (and if not success, then their illusion of power or security). And to achieve this pursuit, people will bottle up their feelings - their authentic selves - to avoid confrontation, embarrassment and other perceived dangers. They’ll go along to get along.

So what needs to change? Regulations? Incentives? Jail sentences? It's much simpler than that. What the business world needs now is a return to the idea of amateur spirit. Now, it’s probably not the amateur spirit as you may think of it. The definition of amateur has evolved for the worse over the past few hundred years, coming to represent a dabbler or incompetent. The original spirit of amateur was a positive, noble tag to apply to someone (the Latin root for amateur is "amator," lover). An amateur pursuit was one you did for love, with a spirit of passion and authenticity. And it certainly didn't imply a lack of skill. Thomas Jefferson was an amateur writer and philosopher when he drafted the Declaration of Independence.

Organizations - actually the people in them - must recapture this amateur spirit. Not because it is morally right, but because it's the only way to succeed in a world stunned by scandals and greed-is-good ideology. Ask yourself these simple questions: Do you want customers and employees to come to you first - and stay with you? Do you want them to recommend you to their friends and associates? Then you have to get them to do what? Trust you. And how do you go about doing that in a post-Enron economy? Certainly not by saying, "Trust me." That kind of talk immediately causes people to put up their defenses. Instead, you must get them to believe! Success today all boils down to belief. "Who should I believe? Who can I believe?" These are the critical questions. You must be believed to have any chance of success.

But I have some bad news: No one will believe you. That’s right. In today’s court of public opinion, you are guilty until proven innocent. It’s the harsh business reality of our time. But there is a way to quickly transcend this reality. Here’s how: Within the first few seconds of meeting you or being exposed to your communications, your audience will form an impression that is easily reinforced and unlikely to change. They’ll observe your mannerisms, voice, choice of words, etc. and judge whether you are worth listening to. To cut through their innate disbelief - and very short attention span -simply push past your comfort level and be authentic! Amazingly, that’s all there is to it. Simply take off your mask - your title, your expertise, your bureaucratic language and technical jargon - and connect with them with honest, simple, and engaging language. Be on the level. Be moved to candor. Tell them what you believe and what you think. Speak the unspoken. Try it and see.

Do you have kids? I do. And without having any idea, mine have put everything into perspective for me. Especially how to gain trust and love: Say what you mean. Mean what you say. And don’t be mean when you say it. Don’t be defensive. Lighten up. Children have an inherent sense of honesty and humor that adults adore. It’s this authentic nature that you connect with. It doesn’t connect with you because it’s cute. It connects because it’s true. And you know it. So listen to your innocent, inner voice. Be childlike. Speak in a language that is natural, open, and honest. Get rid of all of the hype and toss in a dash of self-deprecating humor. State what you feel in a candid and caring, yet unapologetic way. And never - never - hide anything. People will then believe that you are being straight with them (warts and all), and as a result, you’ll be worthy of their trust.

Daniel Boorstin wrote: "The amateur is not afraid to do something for the first time." And that's the measure of great artists, great lovers, and great entrepreneurs (not to mention children). To say, "I don't know." To ask the hard question that is on your mind (in a soft way). To take risks. To be bold. To state what you are feeling, openly. To admit your weaknesses. To adopt this amateur spirit takes courage and demonstrates your love for - and connects you on an emotional level with - your audience. They’ll believe you. It will demonstrate your trust in them, and your desire to eliminate their fears and their concerns. And it will inspire them and engender trust because it rings true.

Posted July 24, 2006
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