Tom Asacker

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Truth Four - From Interesting to Interested

It doesn’t matter what people think about you or your company. What matters is how you make people feel about themselves and their decisions in your presence.

Whenever I make this statement during my seminars, everyone immediately stops writing and I get some really curious looks. I then go on to tell the story of a woman who was asked her impression of the two renowned British statesmen, Benjamin Disraeli and William Gladstone, after dining with them. She replied: "When I left the dining room after sitting next to Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest man in England. But after sitting next to Mr. Disraeli, I was sure that I was the cleverest woman in all of England." "So, who do you think she would prefer to spend her time with in the future?" I ask. I typically pause and watch as heads slowly nod up and down, and I think: "They get it! Great!" At least, that is, until they return to work, when I'm sure that it's right back to their habitual, narcissistic ways. Take a look at 99.999% of all marketing communications, from Web sites and direct mail, to sales sheets and advertising. They're all SHOUTING . . . "Look at me!" "Am I great, or what?" "Buy me!" and other irritating noise that no one gives a damn about. This loud voice of business is completely out of touch with the subtle, more compelling voice in the heads of today's audience. Why? Because people aren't interested in you. They want you to be interested in them, and to show them how their association with you will help them feel better about themselves.

I don't know why so many people and organizations get this wrong, but I have a guess. I think it's because being genuinely interested in others, and working to understand their feelings and motivations, is tough: it's imprecise, messy, and time consuming. It's much easier and faster to talk about something that we know a lot about . . . us and our stuff! We simply memorize all of the pertinent facts and then when it's time, flip the brain/mouth switch and out it pours. It's also easier to simply bury our heads and focus on getting things done, isn't it? "Five sales calls to make . . . better get hustling!" "Two ads to create, as well as a capability brochure and a direct mail piece. No time to think." "The company is measuring me on number of transactions. Slow down and listen? Yeah . . . right." But guess what? That's great news for you! Because by being other-focused and truly interested in your audience, you'll stand out. Simply because no one else is doing it.

I once met with an entrepreneur to discuss his strategy for a new products launch. As he passionately recounted the story of their development and described the various human factor considerations designed into his products - from ease of use and comfort, to the choice of color and durability of materials - it became clear to me that his audience was first and foremost in his mind. And then . . . he handed me his sell sheet. And what was it oozing with? Features and benefits, of course. The completely rational copy emphasized all of the products' nuances and advantages compared to his competitors' products. Differences that he was justifiably very proud of. So, after discussing these differences, we concluded that any logical person would choose his product over the competition in a nanosecond. He only had one little problem - finding logical people.

Isn't it strange? He designed his products to excite his audience, to prevent human error, to save them time and money, and to enhance their experience. But he took the exact opposite approach when designing his communications. Instead of trying to prevent human error, he filled it with confusing data and meaningless "chest-thumping" superlatives. Rather than attempting to save his customers time and money, he'll probably waste it by inundating them with redundant information, sales calls, junk mail and e-mail. And instead of trying to enhance his customers' experiences with his company, he'll most likely use his cleverness and either try to impress them or try to make his customers like him by telling them all about what makes his company so special . . . so interesting.

It's really quite simple: If you want people to pay attention to your communication, you must tune into their frequency. Their current situation. Their anxieties, desires and fears. Establish an emotional bond based on your audience's feeling of finally having been understood by someone. Because if people feel that you are genuinely interested in them, they’ll be much more likely to open up and interact with you, and give you the information that you need. So stop, sit down and scrutinize every single piece of company communication, from sales presentations to annual reports. Do they speak to your audience in terms of what's most important to them? Do they speak with passion and caring and energy? Will they make their eyes grow wide and pulse quicken?

Posted June 26, 2006
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