Friedrich Nietzsche on stupidity

"To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity."

USA Today has published its 10 rules to make ads magical in today's Money section. Here you go advertising wannabes (with excerpts):

  1. Make 'em laugh out loud. "Like my commercial, and there's a chance you'll like my product," says Bob Kuperman, vice chairman of DDB, which has created Super Bowl ads for Anheuser-Busch for years.
  2. Shock 'em and surprise em. Viewers watching the Super Bowl have a mindset that dares advertisers to "show me something I've never seen before," says Nina DiSesa, chairman of McCann-Erickson New York.
  3. Let em see the point. "Complex dialogue is your enemy," warns Jeff Goodby, co-chairman at Goodby Silverstein & Partners. "If your commercial works without sound, all the better."
  4. Let animals be people, too. I would be a fool to try to explain the magnetism of animals," says DDB's Kuperman. "Their power to entertain and engage has been proven undeniable."
  5. Let celebrities be people, too. Phil Dusenberry, former chairman of BBDO, has overseen many of Pepsi's celebrity-laden Super Bowl spots through the years. "The celebrity must have some believable link to the brand," he says.
  6. Coin a catchphrase with legs. There's little more satisfying for a Super Bowl advertiser than to hear an ad slogan created for Super Sunday repeated incessantly in schoolyards and around water coolers on Monday. Creating a message that becomes part of the pop culture is solid gold in Super Bowl advertising," says Kaplan Thaler.
  7. Make it bigger than TV. Super Bowl spots now must be interactive — or die. They must alluringly link the viewer with the advertiser's website. As a culture, "We don't just want to consume the brand — we want to swim in it," says Steve Conner, chief creative officer at Burrell Communications Group.
  8. Pluck the heartstrings. The Super Bowl might seem an odd place for sentiment. Who wants to get teary-eyed among friends or co-workers? Answer: Actually, everyone — even a Super Bowl viewer —wants to care. "I think that men who are filled with beer cry more easily," jokes DiSesa.
  9. Reflect diversity — smartly. Diversity without stereotyping ranks among the most difficult concepts to pull off in a Super Bowl ad. "Cultural intelligence is a part of being smart," says J. Melvin Muse, CEO of Muse Communications.
  10. Be topical — carefully. It's not easy, given that many Super Bowl ads are filmed months in advance, but being topical can be huge. Critical point: Make sure the joke is understood — as this was. "You can't tell an inside joke," says Conner, "if no one's on the inside with you."

Maybe I'm being a little picky, but wouldn't it be nice to weave the product or service benefit into the ad? I mean, if we must keep the list to ten, then let's get rid of the celebrities.  We're all a little tired of them any way, right?

Without stimulating someone to try - and then buy - isn't it simply entertainment? Kind of like this list of winning words published by The Washington Post, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words, is to litterateurs?

  1. Coffee (n.) the person upon whom one coughs.
  2. Flabbergasted (adj.) appalled over how much weight you have gained.
  3. Abdicate (v.) to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
  4. Esplanade (v.) to attempt an explanation while drunk.
  5. Willy-nilly (adj.) impotent.
  6. Negligent (adj.) describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
  7. Lymph (v.) to walk with a lisp.
  8. Gargoyle (n.) olive-flavored mouthwash.
  9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
  10. Balderdash (n.) a rapidly receding hairline.
  11. Testicle (n.) a humorous question on an exam.
  12. Rectitude (n.) the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
  13. Pokemon (n) a Rastafarian proctologist.
  14. Oyster (n.) a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
  15. Frisbeetarianism (n.) (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
  16. Circumvent(n.) an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

Enjoy the game!

Posted February 3, 2006
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Comments

Tim Whelan

Great List and Yes, the Celebes must go. I’d rather see anew pretty face than a trite one. Good point and yes the spots are very entertaining.

I believe the last couple of rounds of analysis show this to be the basic perception of Joe football consumer. Out of all my friends and others that I have questioned over the past month, all 200 are football fans, not one has run out storming the stores or markets of America to buy anything presented in the TV spots. I know they do affect some of the more disillusioned memebers of America, but in my brief poll the indicators weren’t reflected. However, they all agree that the spots are great entertainment and cheaper than a movie.

Posted by: Tim Whelan | February 03, 2006 at 11:46 PM

American Copywriter

I'm with you in general, Tom. However, on the Super Bowl, an ad must entertain. That's what the audience is expecting. The Super Bowl is the original stage for Branded entertainment. I don't think any of the strategies on the list are mutually exclusive of "selling." The best Super Bowl ads sell while they entertain. 1984 and Mean Joe Green prove that.

Posted by: American Copywriter | February 04, 2006 at 11:18 AM

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